Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Can I crib please?

The heat in Chennai seems much bearable nowadays thanks to the London like weather (Ah ! London..how I miss it). Its bright and sunny one moment and dark and grey the next. It even rained a couple of minutes for a couple of days. But nothing to beat the rain in Bombay. Infact Amith Chandhran SMSed me this morning asking me if I missed the rain in Bombay or if I missed Bombay at all. You know its very strange, throughout the years when I lived there, I used to curse the city, its traffic, uncollected garbage, bad roads etc but in the last couple of months, I’ve missed the city more than ever before. And here’s why….

Minimum rickshaw fare in Bombay is Rs 9 /- and that too for a distance of a kilometer and a half (1.6 kms equals a mile you see…..ah ! London again). So if we every hired a rick for the minimum distance and paid the driver with a ten rupee note, we would make sure he returned the balance. Why should he pocket it? I’d rather give it to a beggar !! But here in Chennai, the minimum auto fare depends on who you are, whether you can speak Tamil, what mood the driver is and so on…but I’ve been given to believe that the minimum here is Rs 20/ - (no fixed distance) and now post the fuel hike, it is Rs 25/-…whoa !! distances upto 2 kms usually will cost you 30 or 40 bucks!!

I wanted to to see Woodstock Villa and Sarkar Raj last week and guess what I discovered ? That Chennai city has only a couple of multiplexes worthy of mention. Inox near my house and Sathyam slightly further down…there is a Mayajaal which is on the outskirts. So no Adlabs, Cinemax, PVR, Movietime….boooooooh !! At a distance of 5 minutes from my house in Bombay is Cinemax, another 5 minutes later another Cinemax, 2 minutes further down an Adlabs, 5 minutes further down PVR, another 10 minutes Adlabs ………the list is endless……….SPOILT FOR CHOICE LITERALLY !!…..here ofcourse, you can get half a dozen other theatres where you can watch someone worse looking than you romancing an extremely fair and sometimes plump lady. I made up my own ‘Mastercard Series’ for this one…….

Bombay

Movie Tickets at PVR - 180 bucks
Home Delivery of Tickets - 40 bucks
Having a glass of chilled beer at home before the show - 50 bucks
Heading to your favourite restobar after the show - 1000 bucks
Driving back home drunk without getting caught by the cops - Priceless

Chennai

Trying to locate a multiplex - priceless
Trying to locate a hindi movie in a multiplex - priceless
Trying to convince an auto to take you to the show - priceless
Watching a guy worse looking than you romance a fair and plump lady at a theatre - 50 bucks !!

The first weekend I landed here, I went wine shop hunting trying to locate a shop that would help me stock up for visitors and guests and I couldn’t locate a single shop. Hesitatingly I asked a shopowner where I could find a wine shop and he guided me next door through a sleazy passage that led to what looked like a prison canteen. Lowly types gulping strangely coloured liquids from glasses, bottles and even sachets !! Gosh ! At the counter, there seemed to be a mad scramble with everyone showing their hands through iron bars flashing currency at the completely disinterested salesman asking for their favourite. Here’s how my conversation went….

“Bacardi ?”
shake of head

“Breezer?”
shake of head

“Smirnoff?”
shake of head

“Fosters / Kingfisher ?”
Loudly and suddenly - “we only have BULLET…….”

I have never entered those thoughtfully done up shops ever again and my guests (the drinking types) have to be content with Tropicana fresh juice.

So you may wonder why am I still hellbent on living in a city that I have no particular fondness for…its for one thing that completely overshadows all of the above…well almost !! (I’d still like to see the latest Hindi films in good multiplexes and am ready to pay 180 bucks for it…I promise I will not crib about the exorbitant charges)………and that is for DMan and his notes (get it?)…..

Posted by The Lion at 18:59:05 | Permalink | Comments (9)